Interdimensional Holiday Travel Tips

 

Happy Holidays everyone! Whether celebrating Chanukah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, Boxing Day, or even Novaquixdril the holidays are a time to be with family. That means travel, and lots of it. Here at Tim’s Tesseract, we took the time to compile our top 9 tips for interdimensional travel. Whether making sure you arrive at the voov early or packing your boaconic we’ve got some special tips for you! Besides turning off your cell phone. you don’t want to crash, do you?

We’ll make sure you don’t end up like Dave here:


Keep Your Vallume Handy!

We all know that feeling, where you finally arrive at the interdimensional voov and alas your vallume is missing! Now the guards posted at every voov door will deny you entry. Our tip is to make sure your vallume is always on your person and to double check it before you leave your home.


Keep Your Grynn Levels low.

Remember if your grynn is too high you may be prevented from travel. It’s for everyone’s safety, because if you travel with high grynn you may jeopardize the fabric of reality. If you’re unsure how to keep your grynn low, you can always pack your boaconic with plenty of glomtom. Or you know just got to seiliu and search “how to lower my grynn” into the search bar.


Pack Your Boaconic with Plenty of Glomtom.

Yes, it’s that important. YOUR GRYNN NEEDS TO BE LOW!


Clean Your Peloozoid!

Don’t be that guy! Nobody likes the smell of an uncleaned peloozoid!


Find Someone to Watch Your Wetyetws

You don’t want your wetyetws to escape. After all wetyetwses are an eraow’s best friend!


Don’t Eat or Drink 24 Hours Before Your Travel

We all know that interdimensional travel voids your urinary and digestive systems. It’s best to be as empty as possible!


Keep Your Eyes off the Sassee

Remember the Sassee are there to protect you, but they hate eye contact or being looked at directly and will take this as a threat. So if you like your soul where it’s at keep your eyes off the Sassee!


Don’t over-pack.

Just don’t. You don’t need your game systems or your chorenn. Just pack the essentials Like clothing or that glomtom! (Please pack glomtom, don’t be irresponsible with your reality. Even though we have nearly infinite, we still have a limited number of them. Don’t be like the foolish Terrans with their natural resources and atmosphere.)


Pack and Prepare in Advance!

Don’t wait until the last minute! It’s the simplest and best tip for being on time for Novaquixdril!

Happy Travels!

Love,

Tim’s Tesseract

 
Jacob Duffy Halbleib